needsmoregun: (wrench)
[personal profile] needsmoregun
Hey buddy,

Well, if that ain't the worst birthday I've ever had, it sure is up there. Got in a bit of a situation with that scum-suckin' mudbug B.L.U. hired to take over for ya. Sad to say there weren't any fatalities, but we both went 'n landed ourselves in the ward. Asshole there thought it'd be a good idea to bust me in the unmentionables. And the head. Don' worry, though - I beat the fella within an inch of his life, 'n Doc says the damage ain't so bad as all that. I oughta be gettin' out soon enough.

Hope to hell, anyway. Can't take much more of his simperin'.

Shit, I remember you lyin' here right in this bed like this. You remember that? All doped up to hell. Don't think that morphine's doin' much for me, personally, but






fuck I miss you. Dunno how to say it. Awful weird. For me, I mean. Guess I don't mind usually. I mean - that ain't what I mean. I mean it ain't like I usually sit around feelin' like I got somethin' weighin' heavy on me, might pop if I don't talk to somebody. Scream or somethin'. Or just wantin' to see you. I dunno.

Keep tryin' to imagine you comin' to see me, but I ain't too good at imagining. Guess I oughta get better. Ain't much else to do. Stuck here. That faggot across the way. Can't goddamn think with that prick around.

... You think your family liked me okay? I dunno about some of them kids. Or your wife, for that matter. Shit.
Shit.
I hope she aint' mad. I dunno. I ain't into the whole idea much but for what it's worth I guess she seem s nice and all, I just -

oh. I'm sorry about the cobbler too, you oughta tell her.

That asshole's up an' callin' for Doc. Christ. Dunno how the hell Doc puts up with all this shit.

Wonder what you're up to. Must be awful nice bein' home.





Think I dreamed. Not much in the habit of doin' it, but I guess this stuff ain't too bothered by that idea. Think you were in it. I dunno.

Wonder what time it is? Probly around four. Can't see. No damn windows. Doc ain't here though, and he's usually up if anybody is. Even that dummy across the way quit his damn snorin'. For now, anyhow.

S'like there's somethin' tearin' at me when it gets like this. Whole ward seems like white spaces stretched out into infinity. Can't believe I'm lyin' in this bed without you in it. Can't believe I'm still here. The hell am I doin' here? I ain't supposed to be here. Hell, I shoulda left a long time ago. Saved you the trouble. Maybe you coulda got away safe. I don't like thinkin' like this. Wanna quit. Can't.

This aint' safe for either one of us, you know that. I

frget it. Tired. Head hurts. I miss you, buddy. Never meant for all this shit to get so damn complicated, but I hope to hell I make it home to you safe.


Maybe if I--







I forget what I was gonna say there. Maybe I'll ask Doc to give this a once-over 'fore I send it off.

Date: 2010-01-23 07:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beecavebuilder.livejournal.com
((Did he send this or a similar letter off?))

Date: 2010-01-23 09:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] needsmoregun.livejournal.com
((He's debating it. It's obviously got some stuff he won't want the company to see. He's likely to take the option of concealing it if he does, and also of sending a brief letter of explanation, so give him until he gets out of the hospital - should be a couple days now.))

Date: 2010-01-23 11:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hurtful-healing.livejournal.com
((Awww RED ;_; You miss your man?))

Date: 2010-01-24 06:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] needsmoregun.livejournal.com
((Always does. :P That ain't news by now, I'm sure.))

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